This is the cartoon:
This is the statement:
Contributors to our Editorial and Opinion pages have the right to express their views, and satire is clearly used in Jerry Holbert’s cartoon today. That said, we sincerely regret if we inadvertently offended anyone and extend our sincere apologies.
This is me:
(well, not literally me because I would never wear a shiny cornhusk placemat on my head for 3 seasons in a row, but you get the idea)